YOU CAN CALL ME CRASH

I have not had a good couple of car weeks, you can call me CRASH!

Two weeks ago, my car was involved in a hit and run accident. The back side panel and stuff dented and scratched.
Last week, I was leaving Toyota Guy's house and the car wasn't moving. I looked down and the parking brake was on (TG just has to put in on....something about otherwise your car being parked by a rubberband...I don't know, I really know nothing about cars). So I turned off the parking brake, the dog nudged me and I side-swiped a park car.
Needless to say, I got a rental car while my car is at the shop.
Yesterday, I hopped on the highway on the way to a meeting but there was tons of traffic. One of the two tunnels was shut down due to an accident. I called Belltone and told her I was going to be running late. No big deal. I finally got into the one working tunnel and drove my way out. Then BAM!!! A dump truck hit me and another girl who was shoved into another car. I CRASHED MY RENTAL CAR!! You know I'd like a say that this is where my story ends but this really can use some comic relief and because these things ONLY happen to me, of course weird stuff happened!!
My neck and shoulder were hurting so I was taken to the hospital in an amublance. While in the ambulance, the guy in the back decided to take me to Shock Trauma due to my past medical history and where my pain was so he has the driver pull over. She climbed in the back to help him hook me up to an IV. Then he told her where we were going and she climbs out of the ambulance. All of a sudden the guy asks her if she knows where shock trauma was. She didn't. SHE CLIMBED OUT OF THE AMBULANCE AND WAS GOING TO DRIVE WHERE?????? It took him five times to explain to her where we were going. FIVE TIMES!!! By the fourth time, I wanted to shout at her where to go and I'm directionally challenged and tied to a board in an ambulance. She finally understands the directions and gets into the drivers seat and gets moving. The guy explained to her that we're going to shock trauma she may want to put on the lights and sirens. SHE COULDN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO PUT THEM ON. She had to pull over so he could get out of the back to teach her how. Seriously these things only happen to me!! We get to shock trauma and they're a little pre-occupied. They were having a disaster drill. A DISASTER DRILL!! Their were people (actors) lying around with limbs hanging, branches and other things sticking out of their body. Like if there had been an explosion. I ended up being in shock trauma from 9:30 to 4:45. It was horrible.
I'm doing okay today, just really sore and exhausted! And I have to admit, completely terrified to drive. Luckily I don't have a car at the moment. I need to get my stuff out of the rental, take some pictures and then speak to the rental agency to return that car. Call the agent for the side swiping accident and tell them I need a new rental!!

YOU CAN JUST CALL ME CRASH!!!!!